WWF Monday Night Raw
July 13th 1998
Live On The U.S.A. Network 21:00 - 22:00
It's the World Wrestling Federation, it's Monday night, it's live, it can only mean one thing. It's time to get Raw!
We're only six days away from In Your House, and things are gonna get hot. We'll be running down the card in full, with more matches announced during the course of the show. FYI, there will be *no* Thunder this week, due to the Goodwill Games. There will be no report on the Goodwill Games, so please don't ask for one.
'Oh... Oh... Shawn!'
Michaels heads to the ring, looking in great shape, and in great spirits. Hit it Shawn.
Michaels : ' East Rutherford, you're looking at the next World Wrestling Federation Champion of the world!'
Mixed pop. Whether it was positive or negative, it certainly was loud.
Michaels : ''That’s quite a reception, and I hope you can make your minds up before Sunday, when I beat the living shit out of Steve Austin. It’s become clear to me, over the course of the last month, that Steve Austin doesn’t have what it takes to be world champion, whilst the HeartBreak Kid... most definitely *does*. What kind of a champion risks permanent injury by storming out of a hospital in shitty condition, then goes and gets himself arrested for assaulting Double J at a *gas station* in New York?! Good god, what kind of an *idiot* pulls a dumbass stunt like that? But while Double J and Austin get all in a mess about each other, like I said on Thunder, Shawn Michaels is out relaxing, getting in the best shape of his life, priming myself for the WWF title.'
Michaels : 'It’s been three months since that belt was around my waist, since *my* belt was around my waist, but that’s all gonna be forgotten at Summerslam. Back on April 6th, it was plain for all to see, that Shawn Michaels was screwed out of the world title. By Sid, by Jarrett, whoever, it don’t matter, the point is, that was an injustice. And as the sheriff of the World Wrestling Federation, one thing I can’t stand, is injustice. And just as the HeartBreak Kid looked set to take his title back clean and fair, along comes ‘Stone Cold’ Steve Austin.’ Austin? Your mother should have told you never to mess with fire, because the HeartBreak Kid is on fire, and you don’t mess with the Heart... Break... Kid.'
Michaels : 'Over the past near twenty years, everyone, but everyone, who messed with the HeartBreak Kid, got burned, and got burned bad. Bret Hart, Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Shane Douglas, all self professed legends, and in 1998, I superkicked each and every one of them to the canvas, and they weren’t getting up. But... Despite HBK’s god-given natural ability, and the fact that Shawn Michaels is the foundation of the WWF, the foundation upon which this industry is built from, and the focal centre point of this *planet*, the fact remains, and that fact is this : This company, the WWF, keeps screwing Shawn Michaels!'
Michaels : 'Now I know you’re all thinking, Shawn, damnit, we had to sit through WCW Bash At The Beach last night, and we had to sit through the Hitman, who I ran out of the WWF on January 24th this year, talking about being screwed at the Rumble. But Shawn Michaels isn’t here to vaguely rant like a has been who never was like Bret, I’m here to show the world, point by screwjob point, exactly what I’m talking about. I was pretty laid back and restrained on Thunder, but now it’s time to unload on everybody.’
The crowd is getting restless already.
Michaels : ‘Now what I’d like to do right now, is show the world the injustice that Shawn Michaels has had perpetrated upon himself, by Sid, by Jarrett, by Austin, by the whole WWF. I got some footage, and if those undergraduate HBK wannabes in the truck can cue that up for me, that’d be just fine. Come on, it’s only a 2 hour show, and I got a lot of things to get off my chest here. Okay, here we go.’
Footage of Shawn Michaels versus Jeff Jarrett from April 6th 1998 is shown on the Titantron.
Michaels : ‘Now what we can see here quite clearly, is the WWF turning a blind eye as Shawn Michaels has to contend with three men, in a nationally televised world title defence. Sid comes in, he powerbombs me, and no-one does a damn thing about it, because no one wants to stand up to Sid, and no one gives a crap about Shawn Michaels! There we go, 1, 2, 3, new bullshit champion. As if that wasn’t enough, they then turn down my reasonable claim to a re-match, and they give me *this* abomination.’
Footage of Jarrett vs Michaels vs Sid vs HHH from April 19th [WWF InYourHouse2] is shown.
Michaels : ‘So instead of giving me a straight up title match, which I deserved, being the rightful champion, they throw me in a match with two other guys, neither of whom deserved a world title shot. Sid should have been suspended for his actions two weeks previous, but no, he gets a pay per view world title shot, despite having beaten nobody, except when he was *my* partner. And that’s not all. I’m already not getting a fair one on one shot at the title, they include a bullshit, screwjob, over the top rope ruling as well, which, as you just saw, got me eliminated from the match, despite once again not being down for an honest three count. Jesse Jammes, he’s a harmless little piece of crap, but he burnt bridges right there. And even *then*, they wouldn’t give the HeartBreak Kid a title shot. Roll May 17th.’
Footage of Jarrett/Express vs Michaels/Gunn/HHH [WWF InYourHouse3] is shown.
Michaels : ‘One month later, at To Live And Die In L.A...’
This sucks. Let’s take a break.
[Commercials]
Michaels has now reached the point in the interview where his voice has degenerated into a throaty growl. You know what I'm talking about.
Michaels : ‘...as Austin came in, pulled me off of Jarrett, and screwed Shawn Michaels once again. Let’s move on three weeks, as we move to the King Of The Ring, as *finally* HBK gets a little retribution. As I laid the Superkick into Austin’s face, I got a thirst for it. Screwing him out of the title, just like Sid screwed *me*, just like Jarrett screwed *me*, just like Jammes screwed *me*, and just like Austin screwed *me*, that felt good. And on July 19th, it’s gonna be just like the King Of The Ring, as I set you up and Superkick you into unconsciousness, and step towards the World title. July 19th, the Last Chance Saloon, Austin, you ain’t coming out alive!’
‘Oh... Oh...-’
Michaels : ‘Hold it, I ain’t done yet.’
The crowd boos. Michaels was ranting all through the three minute commercial break. It would help if there wasn’t near a five second pause between nearly every other word.
Michaels : ‘I’ve been talking about the past, and I’ve been talking about the future. But what I want to talk about now, is the present. Tonight. Best of my knowledge, Austin ain’t here, and I inquired earlier, doesn’t look like Jarrett and his boys are. But that’s fine, the HeartBreak Kid is gonna get his hands on Jarrett and Austin real soon. Even though Shawn Michaels has been getting into the best shape of his life, he’s still a little rusty lately, in this here squared circle. So I’m issuing an open challenge. Anyone who want’s to get Superkicked, show your face.... now.’
Eyes to the curtains. Well if it ain’t the number one contender to the Intercontinental Title, Owen Hart.
Michaels : ‘Well, look who it is. Little Owen Hart. Hey, remember back at The Rumble, when I ran your brother outta town? That was great. You’re telling me you want to get it on with me? I was expecting someone, shall we say, talented, to come out.'
Hart : ‘Michaels, you’re out here boring the crap out of all these people here in New Jersey [token crowd pop], and I’m here to put a stop to it. You’re here whining about being screwed, but to the best of my knowledge, you’re in the main event of next weeks pay per view, so if you’re being screwed over, the WWF ain’t doing much of a job.’
Michaels : ‘You’re the one who’s gonna do the-’
Hart : ‘Oh yeah, that’s cute Shawn. Doing the job. Well my job tonight is to stick you in the Sharpshooter, until I break your damn back.’
Hart leaves and Michaels laughs.
Michaels : ‘You’re gonna break my back? Owen, the chances of the HeartBreak Kid getting any kind of back injury, especially from you, is ludicrous. I’m in the best shape of my career, and once I break your Sharpshooter, I’m gonna superkick your ass right out of this building. And then Austin? I’m comin’ for you!’
Well, that looks to be it. Thanks Shawn. I think we just got killed in the Nielsons by DJ Rad and his bitch Ricki Ratman. But we're about ready for our first match, and it's a big one, as Booker T goes up against Vader!
Booker T vs Vader
Both these men are gonna have an eventful In Your House this Sunday. Booker's gonna take on Triple-H in a street fight, and Vader will face Stevie Ray. Booker T hits the ring first, surprisingly unaccompanied by Stevie Ray, and Vader follows, unaccompanied by fellow ‘Master Of the Powerbomb’ Sycho Sid.
Vader tries to club Booker down with a swinging punch right away, but Booker ducks and starts unloading. Numerous forearm smashes from the lighter of the two men, then he floors Vader with a dropkick! The Rocky Mountain Beast gets right back up to his feet though, and blocks a right hand from Booker. Another block, and he then nails a hard fist to the chest to take control. Vader starts pounding the crap out of Booker, and ends up shoving him down and pummeling him in the corner. The referee has to threaten disqualification to stop Vader from choking the life out of his opponent.
Vader eventually takse a few steps back and allows Booker to rise to his feet, but he then scoops him up for a slam. T makes good use of his elbows though, swinging it into the side of Vader's head. He has to set Booker down to shake off the shot to the head, and when he does, Booker plants him with a DDT! And now it's Booker's turn to unload. He whips Vader into the corner, and follows through with a clothesline, then dishes out a series of kicks to the chest. He whips vader into the opposite corner, and then connects with another clothesline. Climbing up to the second buckle, Booker gives out ten right hands, the capacity crowd counting along with each one.
Booker's in control, and he gets the first two count of the match moments later via a swinging neckbreaker. He continues to hold the advantage, keeping things simple with right nad left hands. It's when Booker tries something more adventurous that the tide turns. A flying cross body block sees Booker fly right into the open arms of the big man, who then turns and powerslams Booker to the canvas. Both men seem to be hitting it in low gear in this one, as Vader sticks to low key offence. He steps it up though, nailing a superplex on Booker! It only gets a two count though, and Vader then applies a sleeperhold. Booker seems to be fading, but finds the strength to stay in the match just at the last second! Yay!
Booker elbows out of the hold, then shoves Vader into the ropes. He leapfrogs him on the return, then turns and nails a standing side kick! Pickup, and Booker sends him for the ride again. Powerslam! Booker goes to cover, but now Triple-H is in the ring, and he jumps on Booker for the DQ!
Booker T defeated Vader by DQ in 0:06:14. Rating: * 3/4
Helmsley starts pounding on Booker, and Vader gets up to his feet and decides to join in. Things are looking pretty bleak for Booker, but then Stevie runs down to ringside!
Ray pulls Vader up to his feet and starts bashing him with his right hand, then clotheslines him over the top rope! Hunter then charges at Stevie, but Ray backdrops *him* out over the top! Ray cleaned house! Booker gets up to his feet, and Harlem Heat stand tall in the ring as Vader and Triple-H walk back down the aisle. All is well in face-land!
Brian Adams had pre-recorded comments to make, and here they are:
Adams : 'I requested this interview time, because CRUSH has a few things to say. About a month ago, I made a business decision that was meant to step up my position here in the WWF. And so far, with the exception of a world tag title shot, nothing much has happened or changed. But that's gonna change this Thursday night. When Savio and myself step into the ring with the Headhunters, it's gonna be one giant leap towards the tag team titles. With the backing of Billionaire Ted, we're really gonna start seeing some changes around here. But just who the hell are the tag team champions?'
The tag team belts *are* in a bit of limbo at the moment, but I *guarantee* they'll be sorted out this coming Sunday night at In Your House IV. We'll be back.
[Commercials]
Hm. Speaking of tag team action, it seems that Harlem Heat didn't get enough of Vader and Triple-H earlier. During the break, they requested a tag match for later in the show. Will Vader and Helmsley accept the challenge? Probably, but we better ask them first before we make the match. We'll speak to them later, as there's more important things to deal with. Like, a Goldust squash match!
[IC Champion] Goldust vs Chad Austin
As Goldust makes his entrance, we’re told that we’ll hear from Owen Hart [what, again?] at the conclusion of this contest. He’ll of course be facing Goldust for the IC title at In Your House, that is if Goldust retains here [pah]. It’s the champion who’s on the mat first here though, as Austin hits him with a dropkick. He then executes a double axehandle chop on Goldust, then, in a scene that may be a preview of Sunday night, puts on a Scorpion Deathlock!
It’s quickly broken though, and Goldust stands right up to his feet and clocks Chad with a clothesline. He follows with an atomic drop, then a fully fledged shot to the groin puts him down. Curtain Call, and this is probably the only time you’ll ever read this line : Goldust gets the three count on Austin.
Goldust pinned Chad Austin in 0:02:06. Rating: 1/2*
(Goldust retained the WWF Intercontinental Title.)
Dustin gets the win, and Owen Hart is on hand backstage.
Hart : 'Goldust, you may have gotten a win right there, but this coming Sunday night? I'm gonna expose you for the fraud champion you are. Last Thursday night, I put the former champion in the Sharpshooter, and he tapped right out. I'm gonna do exactly the same thing to you Dustin, I don't particularly like it when friends turn their back on me. And Shawn Michaels? I said it earlier, but you're going down by my hand too!'
Only 6 days away, here's the In Your House card in full:
The winner of this latest, and final, addition to the card, will face the winner of the European title four way on next week's edition of Monday Night Raw.
It appears that Vader and Helmsley were contacted backstage, and it looks like the tag match is on. They'll face Harlem Heat later on in the show, and the Heat are backstage right now.
Stevie : 'Vader, Triple-H? You got a beating earlier on, but that's nothing to what's gonna happen later tonight! Me and Booker, we're gonna plant an ass beating on both of ya!'
Booker : 'My match earlier was tough, but hell, I could wrestle a dozen times in one night, and still not get tired out. Tonight, this is just part one. We'll beat the crap outta ya tonight, and we'll do it twice on Sunday! Hooo!'
Stevie : 'Damn right.'
That should be a great tag match, and we'll try and get words with Vader and Triple-H a little later. We'll be back with more wrestling action in a few minutes, but right now, Mabel!
Mabel vs Hack Myers
Unbelievable! Myers starts things off with a powerbomb, but when he tries a second, Mabel counters with a backdrop. Hurracanrana from Mabel, then a springboard moonsault! He covers, but Hack gets his shoulder up at two. Mabel whips Myers into the ropes and attempts a clothesline, but Myers ducks and then takes Mabel up for a gorilla press! Hack has the 500 pound purple poo aloft in the air! And now he's twirling him around with one finger! He tosses him to the mat and clmibs to the top. Quadruple somersault legdrop! Cover for two, and Hack then sends Mabel for the ride again. Mabel ends up getting the advantage back for a dropkick, then explodes! There's purple goo everywhere! Myers is in shock, and he starts singing the Beatle's classic 'Yellow Submarine'! I'm marking out!
Mabel pinned Hack Myers with the Big Splash in 0:01:02 Rating: -**1/2
What are you looking at me like that for?
[Commercials]
'Ahahaha... Money, Money, Money, Money...'
Marc Mero heads to the ring. He's not scheduled for a match here tonight, what's he doing here?
Mero : 'Now I know I'm not scheduled to be here right now, but I'm here to do a little scouting. See, this Sunday, in Binghamton New York, I'm gonna be getting into the ring with Sycho Sid, Fit Finlay, and that champ who's been ducking me, Adam Bomb. So with Bomb and Finlay set to lock up at this time, I thought I'd take a seat at ringside, and laugh at how lame they both are, compared to the Marvelous specimen that is myself. I *promise* I won't get *involved*.'
Mero leaves the ring, grabs a chair, and sits down at the announcers table.
'Nuclear Attack...'
'Nuclear attack' is the new *here comes [x] down the aisle* line for Adam Bomb. Damn the people who don't have words in their theme songs.
[European Champion] Adam Bomb vs Fit Finlay [Non-title Match]
Bomb goes for a side suplex right away, but Fit blocks and ends up immediately throwing the champion to the floor. After pausing to point an accusing finger at Marc Mero, Finlay piledrives Bomb on the concrete! Bomb's hurt, but when he finally get's to his feet, Finlay comes off the apron and nails him with a fying shoulderblock! God, the referee is counting slow here. Fit nails numerous chops and fists on the outside, before executing a suplex, sending Bomb crashing to the floor again.
Another piledriver is attempted, and a second one on the concrete would certainly end the match, but Bomb finds the strength to counter with a backdrop, and now it's Fit's turn to go down hard. Bomb now enters the ring, Finlay following soon after, and it's Bomb who takes control. The champ whips Finlay into the ropes, then catches him with a huge powerslam for a two count. Another ride into the ropes leads to the champ flooring Fit with a dropkick, and then Bomb decides to go up top.
Flying clothesline gets two. Moments later we get another two count after Finlay gets nailed with a DDT. Things are going rather well for Adam, until he attempts to fly off the top turnbuckle again, and ends up getting crotched upon it. Finlay follows Bomb up top, then executes a superplex! Two count, and Fit then resorts to a sleeper hold.
Mero obviously got bored waiting for the inevitable 'arm stays up on the third try' routine, and decides to leave the announcers table. Takes his chair with him though, and enters the ring and lays Finlay out. Bomb goes down too, and the ref throws the match out. Ding ding ding, scewjob.
Fit Finlay and Adam Bomb battled to a no contest in 0:04:01. Rating: * 1/2
Mero poses above the fallen combatants, but, yeah, you know the drill. Sid storms down to the ring, grabs Mero by his neck, and chokeslams him down to the canvas. Sid turns to have some fun with his other two opponents on Sunday night, but gets met with a forearm from the champion! Bomb hammers away on Sid, then clotheslines him out of the ring to the floor! Finlay then gets up and decides *he's* the one who's gonna have the final word, nailing Bomb on the back of the head with a superkick. Mero's down, Bomb's down, Fit's up, and now Sid is making his way back into the ring to deal with Finlay. I've had enough of this though, so we'll cut to a
Promo : WWF In Your House IV - July 19th 1998
‘Stone Cold’ Steve Austin. Shawn Michaels. Jeff Jarrett.
Two of the above are two of the most legendary, most popular, and most talented wrestlers in the sport.
The other is Jeff Jarrett. Trouble is, he's the one wearing the gold.
For both Austin and Michaels, tonight is a step towards revenge.
Just under four months ago, Jeff Jarrett tried to destroy the WWF from within, and stole the WWF World Heavyweight title. Michaels was desperate to get it back. He had three chances. He blew them all. Tonight, this is Shawn Michaels’ last chance. Lose tonight, there won’t be another shot.
Then there’s Austin. For the last three months, he’s gone through everyone in his path. He earned a title shot by defeating the monstrous Sycho Sid inside a steel cage, and had the gold in his hands before Shawn Michaels superkicked it away. Austin’s pinned Jeff Jarrett before though, if he wins tonight, he’d be favourite to do it again.
Tonight, we’ll see the fate of 1998 decided in just one match.
It’s Austin versus Michaels. First time... Last time... Only time.
Still to come tonight, we'll see the Hardy Boyz take on *these* men, Chris Chetti and Jerry Lynn.
Backstage.
Chetti : 'You know, we're only six days away from In Your House, and some people have been saying we're pretty stupid to team with each other, since we'll be facing each other in the ring at In Your House. Well I say, f**k that!'
Lynn : 'That pretty much echo's my sentiments too. I got a lot of respect for *this* guy, and Mysterio too. The Hardy's are gonna be tough competition, and a great warm-up. This is gonna be a great match.'
Chetti : 'And as for Devon Storm's comments on Thunder, I guarantee all the fans, there *will* be a worthy cruiserweight champion after this Sunday. Count on it.'
Ah yes, this past week on Thunder. Footage is shown of the conclusion to the Psychosis/Juventud Guerrera match, and Storm's follow up interview. Then it's backstage, where Juve taped an interview earlier. In spanish, with subtitles.
Guererra : 'The mouse and the chicken ran freely-
Okay, we need a new subtitle guy.
Guerrera : 'This past week on Thunder, Psychosis and myself fought a classic. And due to my performance, I feel there should be some changes made to the In Your House card. The three way cruiserweight contenders match? Make it a four way, and let Juventud Guerrera in. After my display-'
Psychosis enters the area.
Psychsosis : 'Juve, if anyone should be entered into the four way, it's *me*. *I* won that match on Thursday night.'
Psychosis leaves, as does Guerrera, who pauses to shrug his shoulders before he goes.
Back to the ring!
The Hardy Boyz vs Chris Chetti/Jerry Lynn
Matt Hardy starts things off with the former cruiserweight champion Chris Chetti. It's a chop fest to start, as both men seem happy to whack each other to hell for the opening thirty seconds. Hardy then puts Chetti on the mat with a clothesline, and follows up with a springboard legdrop! Quck tag in to Jeff, who climbs up top and let's fly with a dropkick, catching Chetti square in the face. Chetti pops right back up, but Hardy rolls him up in a small package for two.
Matt then steps through the ropes to engage in some dastardly double team manouever, but Lynn makes his first appearance in the ring, and clotheslines Matt right out of the ring. I guess Lynn thought 'I'm in here anyway, might as well help Chris beat up Jeff', as the two men take Jeff up and then down to the canvas with a double suplex. Lynn executes a German suplex before returning to the apron and letting Chetti carry on. Springboard somersault splash from Chetti! Yowza!
Chetti hits a suplex, but before he can continue his offence, Matt returns to the ring, grabs the former champ by the hair, and executes a quick piledriver! Hyprocrite Jerry Lynn is irate, but Matt leaves the ring before the referee can give him any warning. Jeff, now having the upper hand, backs Chetti into the corner, and starts booting the shit out of his chest. He takes Chetti down with an armdrag, then hits a legdrop for a one count. Hardy drags him over to his corner, and makes the tag to Matt, who enters the ring via a flying axehandle, as Jeff holds Chetti in place.
Matt whips Chetti into the ropes, then wraps him up in a sleeper hold. Chetti goes down to one leg, but Lynn gets bored on the apron and breaks the hold. Jeff then springs over the top rope into the ring, and charges at Lynn with his arm extended. Lynn ducks the clothesline attempt though, and floors Jeff with a dropkick! Jeff slides to the floor, and Lynn then dumps Matt out of the ring as well! Lynn helps Chetti up to his feet as we cut to a break.
[Commercials]
When we return, Lynn's going at it with Matt, and has the upper hand. Lynn nails him with a flying clothesline, but his cover attempt is broken by Jeff's boot. Waistlock suplex from Lynn, and he follows it with a superplex. A two count is produced after a DDT, and Chetti then gets tagged in and promptly nails Matt with a DDT of his own. Two count, and Chetti then takes Matt to the corner and dishes out ten right hands, then ten kicks to the chest. Matt staggers about, a little dazed, and he can't get out of the way when Chetti comes off the top with a flying cross body press-
1..
2..
Lynn seems to be discussing something with a ringside fan out on the apron. I wonder if that fan is pointing out that Lynn played an [albiet small] role in the ECW Invasion, and should therefore get the fuck out of the fed. Vinnie Mac seems to have forgotten all about this involvement of Lynn's, as did I unfortunately. Anyway, Chetti currently has Matt in a Boston Crab, and it takes Hardy a good thirty seconds to get to the ropes. As Chetti releases the hold, Matt manages to execute a squeamish groin shot, and Chetti collapses to the mat. Man, even I felt that one.
Matt tags in Jeff, and he marks his arrival by immediately covering Chetti for a two count. Bodyslam from Hardy places Chetti in position, and Jeff then goes up to the top rope! Jeff flies off with the deadly 'dive-right-into-your-opponents-knees' move, and ends up coming off the worse for wear. It's a pretty stupid move really. Both men are down, but it's Chetti who makes the hot tag first! Lynn jumps in, and wastes no time in executing the Tiger Bomb for the victory!
Chris Chetti and Jerry Lynn defeated The Hardy Boyz when Lynn pinned M. Hardy with the Tiger Bomb in 0:08:48. Rating: ** 1/2
Great match, that deserved a better rating. And Chetti and Lynn showed no signs of any problems between them. A turn by one would have been really predictable.
Sid is backstage.
Still to come t-
Oh, they wanted us to *hear* from Sid. I get it now.
Sid : 'July 19th! Last Chance Saloon! Marc Mero, Fit Finlay, Adam Bomb! It's time you all realised, you never mess with the master of the world! On July 19th, I will take the European title because there is only one man who'll step in the ring with the power to defeat three men, and that is the master! And I am that master. Mero, Finlay, Bomb, you all have six days to live, I hope you use that time wisely.'
Sid versus Mero versus Bomb versus Finlay is this Sunday, and the winner will go on to face either the Bulldog or Mabel the next night on Raw. Any of six different people could be holding the European title this time next week.
'Ahahaha... Money, Money, Money, Money...'
We heard from Brian Adams earlier, and here he is again. This time with motion!
Brian Adams vs Alan Stone
Adams controls this one, flooring Stone with a fist to the face right away. He follows it with a vertical suplex, then executes a spinebuster slam. This goes on for a while, before Adams hits the Tilt-a-Whirl slam. I'd elaborate on this match more, but [a] Ally McBeal is distracting me on tv, and [b] I'm aiming to finish the rest of this card in about the next two hours. I very much doubt I will.
Brian Adams pinned Alan Stone with the Tilt-a-Whirl Slam in 0:01:36. Rating: -1/4*
We'll be back in a few minutes, and we'll be speaking to Vader and Triple-H. Also to come tonight, Devon Storm and Brian Christopher take on Psychosis and Juventud Guerrera. Plus, in our main event, the HeartBreak Kid, Shawn Michaels goes one on one with Owen Hart!
[Commercials]
Vader and Triple-H are waiting backstage.
Vader : 'You know, I find it funny! Booker T, get's in the ring, with Vader! And he wants more? Life Lesson Number one : Don't *ever* give Vader a second chance to break every bone in your body! You won't make it to In Your House, both of ya!'
Triple-H : 'Well that suits me just fine. You know something Booker? You really are one dumbass individual, 'cos all I had to do was jump you from behind, and I got you to sign a contract right away for a match. That's the kind of irrational, non-thinking, retarded bahviour I expect from you Booker. And who's this dumbass brother of yours? What's his problem? Seems like all the semen that's been pumped in his ass went to his brain, 'cos this guy makes Booker T look like a goddamn psychology proffessor. Tell 'em what time it is Vader.'
Vader : 'It's Vader time!'
The teams are already in the ring, so let's get started.
Devon Storm/Brian Christopher vs Psychosis/Juventud Guerrera
It's Psychosis and Christopher to start, and Psychosis gets the upper hand first, hitting a quick neckbreaker on Brian when his back was turned. He goes to follow it up with a clothesline, but Christopher manages to counter it with a backslide for the matches first two count. BC then starts dishing out numerous punches to the man from Tijuana, and spends a rather lengthy amount of time choking his opponent out before Storm tags in.
Devon and Brian whip him into the ropes, then nail him with a double dropkick. Christopher leaves the ring, and Storm executes a German suplex for a two count. Right hands from Storm, and a whip into the ropes. Psychosis ducks a clothesline attempt though, and floors the cruiserweight champion with a dropkick! Storm jumps up, and Psychosis then hits another dropkick! Reapeat twice more, and Psychosis then climbs up to the top buckle. Flying sunset flip gets two.
Belly to back suplex gets hit, and Christopher then steps through the ropes, and immediately gets sent crashing to the mat with a hurracanrana! Psychosis spends too much time dealing with Brian though, and gets nailed from behind by Storm. Devon flattens him with a clothesline, then comes off the ropes with a legdrop. Storm locks on a sleeper as Juventud shouts support for Psychosis on the apron. Devon eventually just let's the hold go, and hits a snap suplex before tagging Christopher back into the ring.
Brian with a bodyslam, then it's up to the top for a flying fistdrop, a move that produces a two count on Psychosis. A vertical suplex preludes a piledriver, and this gets two as well. Christopher rakes the eyes across the top rope, and now Storm's in again. Spinebuster slam from the champ, and Psychosis is being completely dominated here. Asai moonsault from Storm, then an armbar submission hold to kill some time.
Psychosis ends up getting to the ropes, but he isn't looking too good right now. Storm goes up for a superplex, but Psychosis manages to block and then executes a powerbomb from the top rop! Devon is down for the count, but Psychosis is unable to cover. Juventud is screaming for him to crawl over and tag, but Storm manages to crawl over to *his* corner and Christopher gets tagged back into the ring. But then, after a good six minutes of in-ring action for Psychosis, he finally makes the tag!
Guerrera springs in over the top rope, and immediately knocks Christopher down with a forearm. Storm's getting to his feet on the apron, but Juve knocks him down to the floor with a right hand! Christopher then goes to sneak up behind Guerrera, but Juve turns, kicks him in the groin, then hits the Juve driver! Brian's almost unconscious, and Juventud drags him over to the corner for a shooting star press.
Guerrera climbs to the top, and Psychosis pushes him off! What the hell was that? Juve falls to the mat, in easy position for Christopher to small package him for a three count.
Brian Christopher and Devon Storm defeated Juventud Guerrera and Psicosis in 0:07:07. Rating: * 1/2
Psychosis then walks off down the aisle, as Storm enters the ring to beat on Juve. Christopher ends up on his feet, and he joins in the beating as well. Stompstompstomp, until Chetti and Lynn run down! The good guyes clear house, and help Juve up to his feet as we cut backstage-
-as we see Shawn Michaels walking around. Apparently he's looking for Jeff Jarrett. Didn't Jarrett say he'd have a surprise for Michaels tonight?
[Commercials]
Footage from after Thunder went off the air is shown, as Owen Hart and Goldust had a little altercation. After Owen disposed of the Rock, Goldust ran down, one thing led to another, and Hart ended up putting Goldust in the Sharpshooter. Will the same thing happen this Sunday?
It's time for the semi main event. Let's go back to the ring.
Harlem Heat vs Vader/Hunter Hearst Helmsley
In a preview of what we *won't* be seeing this Sunday, Triple-H starts out with Vader. Stevie gets off to a good start, staggering Helmsley with numerous forearms, but then falls victim to a dimple eyerake. Hunter poses, then executes a suplex. Whip into the ropes, and Hunter then backdrops him to the canvas. Major stalling from Helmsley as Ray slowly gets to his feet, and I don't like this match already.
Ray gets clotheslined to the floor, and Hunter follows him out and starts hammering him around ringside. Stevie repeatedly makes contact with the guardrail, and then, in a relatively cool move, Helmsley powerslams him on the concrete. Hunter gives Ray a few knees to the chest, then tosses him back inside the ring, where he executes an inverted atomic drop. The crowd is out of this one, no-one likes seeing the heels dominate from the beginning.
Hunter whips Ray into the ropes, then nails him with a clothesline for the match's first cover. it's unsuccessful, and Helmsley pulls Ray over to his corner of the ring and tags Vader in. Vader with a barrage of of right and left hands on Stevie, but Ray ten begins to fight back. Pretty soon he's matching Vader punch for punch, and then he manages to get the Rocky Mountain Beast on the mat with a well aimed shot to the groin! Ray slowly crawls over to the Heat corner, and makes the hot tag to Booker!
Who steps through the ropes, pulls Vader up to his feet, then knocks him right back down with an axe kick! Cover for two. Booker goes top, looking to end this after just over two minutes with the missile dropkick, but Helmsley's there to nail Booker, and crotches T on the top turnbuckle. Vader's now up on his feet, and he then goes and executes a superplex on Booker!
Booker's down for the count, but a recovered Stevie Ray enters the ring and pulls Vader off of the pinfall attempt. He won't leave after that job's done though, and now Helmsley's stepped through the ropes. Four man brawl! Now we see the men who'll be wrestling each other on Sunday pair off, as Vader and Stevie go at it in one corner, and Booker and Helmsley in the opposite corner. Stevie ends up being clotheslined out to the floor by Vader though, and the big man then comes over to aid Helmsley.
There seems to be some trouble in the crowd. Seems like some fan got a little *too* caught up in the excitement, and security seems to be escorting him out. Anyway, back to the match.
Vader holds Booker in place, and Hunter decides to go up top. Going for a flying axehandle, Hunter wasn't planning on Booker moving out of Vader's grasp, nor of Vader taking the full brunt of the shot. That's how it transpires though, and as Vader holds his head on the canvas, Booker plants Hunter with a DDT and gets the pinfall! Hey, Helmsley wasn't the legal man!
Harlem Heat defeated Vader and Hunter Hearst Helmsley when Booker T pinned Helmsley with a DDT in 0:04:03. Rating: -1/4*
As Booker and Stevie make their exit, Vader isn't *too* happy with Triple-H. Helmsley's still down after the DDT, but Vader ensures that he won't be getting up any time soon, by climbing the buckles and flattening him with a Vadersault! Ouch. Vader leaves Hunter laying, and that's two matches in a row where partners have turned on each other. Is Bischoff booking?
Pay Per View Announcement : Commonly regarded as the number two pay per view in the wrestling industry [behind Wrestlemania], WWF Summerslam will be coming your way on the 16th of August, not the 23rd as originally scheduled. The main event? WWF Champion Jeff Jarrett versus either 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin or 'The HeartBreak Kid' Shawn Michaels!
[Commercials]
The Owen Hart/Michaels confrontation from the top of the show is shown.
'Oh... Oh... Shawn!'
Shawn Michaels makes his entrance, as our cameras cut to the outside of the arena, as a limosuine pulls up. Hey, it's the champ! Accompanied by Bart Gunn, Jarrett makes his way towards the arena entrance. Security blocks his way.
Jarrett : 'What the hell is this? Let me in to the damn arena!'
Guard : 'Sorry Mr Jarrett, we've got orders not to let anybody in here after 10pm, that includes you.'
Jarrett : 'But I'm the goddamn champ, get outta my damn way-'
Jeff goes to push his way past, but he ends up being shoved down to the ground. In the background we see someone being escorted into a police car. Looks like it's the fan who got taken out of the arena during the Harlem Heat match. Hey wait a minute, that looks like- It *is* Chris Benoit!
Guard : 'Listen Jeff, you ain't scheduled on the card, I know you haven't got a ticket, so just get the hell out of here!'
Jarrett gets up to his feet.
Jarrett : 'Yeah, well me and Bart didn't want to come in anyway.' Jeff and Bart walk a safe distance away from the guard, and Jarrett pulls out a mobile phone. We can hear Owen Hart's theme music playing in the distance.
With the phone in his hand, the champ dials a number and waits for a response, but there's no answer.
Jarrett : 'Damn, he must have left the arena already. Hey, get that damn camera outta here!'
We go back to inside the arena, where the bell has just rung between Michaels and Owen.
Owen Hart vs Shawn Michaels
Michaels and Hart are already underway, and Hart is currently twisting Shawn's arm. Michaels stops this mild irritation by pulling Owen down to the mat by his hair, but Hart springs right back up, still holding on to the arm. Shawn strolls over to the ropes and grabs on, forcing Owen to finally let go of Michaels. The second lockup of the match sees Shawn brutally punt Owen in the groin, sending him down to his knees.
Camera cuts to the announcers table, where, is that a phone ringing? Lawler dips into his pocket and takes said phone out, and promptly answers it. We can't hear the conversation with whomever was on the other line, as Ross is still doing play by play, as should I. Eventually he puts it away.
Lawler : 'I'm outta here Ross.'
Ross : 'What?'
Lawler : 'You'll never guess who just called me up just now!'
Ross : 'Was it Jeff Jarrett?'
Lawler : 'Uh, yeah. Anyway, he told me I had to get down to the arena entrance, 'cos apparently some security guy won't let him in, and he's got business to attend to here tonight.'
Ross : 'So you're just gonna up and leave?'
Lawler : 'Well I'm honoured, JR! Jeff told me I was the first guy he called to sort this mess out. Wouldn't you be honoured Ross?'
Ross : 'I think I'd be too overcome with the smell of bullshit to be honoured King.'
The King makes a face and leaves, as Owen whips Michaels into the ropes, and then takes him to the mat with a drop-toe-hold. Legdrop from Owen, but Michaels gets to his feet before Hart can cover. Shawn gets sent for the ride, and manages to grab Owen's foot in mid-air when Hart tries to boot him in the chest. Unfortunately for HBK, Hart's got two feet, and the other one meets the side of Michael's head, enzirguiri style!
Cut backstage, hey, Austin's here! And he's currently watching the action here on a monitor backstage. In the background we can see Jerry Lawler walking by. Austin sees him too, and decides he'll watch the rest of this match later.
Hart got a two count from the enzirguiri, and Shawn then got a two count of his own as Owen went for the sharpshooter, but put his head down and ended up getting himself small packaged. Michaels currently has Owen in a standing headlock, but Hart manages to counter with a side suplex. Hart covers for two, and now we've got Goldust coming down to the ring. Can't we just concentrate on the match?
Owen puts on a reverse chinlock, as we see on the Titantron that somebody laid out the King backstage. Lawler's currently stroking a sore jaw as he sits on his ass on the ground. No sign of Stone Cold though.
Back to the action, and it looks like Shawn is as distracted by Goldust's presence as Owen is. To be honest, Hart doesn't look that distracted at all, and keeps the upper hand, putting Michaels in an abdominal stretch. Michaels gets to the ropes though, and then swings his leg back to catch Owen with the second groin shot of the match. After taking a second to get his head straight, Michaels hits an elbowdrop on Owen, then climbs to the top.
Shawn waits for Hart to get to his feet, then hits a flying cross body press! It gets nothing more than a two count. Shawn pulls Owen up to his feet and whips him into the ropes. Hart doesn't make it back to Michaels, as his bounce is interrupted by the hand of Goldust, who trips him from the floor. Hart falls to the canvas, yet it's Michaels who takes offence at this, and he steps through the ropes, and jumps down from the apron.
Walking towards Goldust, Michaels looks pretty pissed off, and the sexual body language Dustin is directing towards him ain't helping. Superkick, down he goes. Michaels then gives him a crotch chop, and it's probably a good thing that Goldust's unconscious, you don't want people taking that message the wrong way. While this is going on, Hart's gotten up to his feet, and comes flying off the top turnbuckle, nailing Shawn with a flying clothesline to the floor!
Both men hit hard on the concrete though, and they're both currently lying face up on the floor. Goldust is also out, and this would be the perfect time to cut backstage to any extra-curricular activities. No? I guess we'll have to wait until the match gets going again then. It's Owen who gets up to his feet first, and he rolls Shawn back into the ring. Both men were down for nearly a minute, and yet the referee counted neither out.
As Goldust starts to get up to his feet, Hart prepares for the Sharpshooter. He starts stomping on Michaels' leg, then drops a knee right across it. Three more kneedrops, then the old headbutt to the groin. Owen then points to Goldust, and locks the Sharpshooter on!
We go backstage once again, to see Austin walking back in the direction of the ringarea, with the World Heavyweight title around his waist! [Don't worry, there won't be a belt angle like with the Rock in *reality*] Then we cut to outside, where, holy shit! I'm not quite sure where Bart Gunn is, but it looks like Austin put Jarrett through the windshield of the limosuine!
The security guard from earlier, and a couple of other security personnel are gathered round the scene [where the hell were they when this took place?] and an ambulance is apparently on it's way. Holy shit, what a mess!
Still in the Sharpshooter, Michaels fights it and fights it, and *eventually* reaches the bottom rope, forcing the hold to be broken. Oh, did I mention Goldust assisted Michaels, pulling him closer to that bottom rope?
Owen's pissed, and goes after Goldust. And continues to go after Goldust. As Dustin departs down the aisle, Hart follows him every step of the way, completely forgetting about the match. The referee's count reaches ten and ARGH, what a crappy finish.
Shawn Michaels defeated Owen Hart by countout in 0:08:28. Rating: ***
Owen and the Intercontinental Champion disappear behind the curtains, as Michaels has his hand raised by the referee, and the match result gets announced by the Fink. Well, partially announced, as it gets cut off by
'Kee-rash'
Austin appears, and comes down the aisle towards Michaels. Shawn sees the belt around Austin's waist and looks puzzled, but there's no time to think about that now. Michaels beckons him forward, and Austin enters the ring. The two men are nose to nose and- oh no, we're out of time!
See you at In Your House!